Text Messages 5

Tanong pang beauty contest:
"Kung ikaw ay maganda...

...sinong may sabi at saan daw banda?"
Hahahaha! Bastusan!
Edwin Gutierrez, May 18, 2009

Juan: Psst. Hoy Dro, unsay answer sa no. 3? Old McDonald had a ____? Dog to noh?
Pedro: Bugo-a nimo oi! Farm oi!
Juan: Sakto, unsa pud ang spelling
Pedro: E-I-E-I-O
Edwin Gutierrez, May 18, 2009

"Oplan Tuli"
Nanay: Nak, sakit imo tuli?
Anak: Dili man ma.
Nanay: Why man hilak ka?
Anak: Akoa oten gitatoo-an man gud ug "Through the Initiative of Boy Nograles"
Edwin Gutierrez, May 18, 2009

Pulis: Bakit mo tinapon ang batang alaga mo?
Yaya: Utos ng amo ko sir!
Pulis: Inutos sa iyo?
Yaya: Opo. Sabi po kasi niya: "Kung wala nang Pampers, Huggies mo na lang."
Edwin Gutierrez, May 18, 2009

Sa botika:
Lalaki: Day, isa gani ka condom.
Saleslady: Size sir!
Lalaki: (Nag-blush) Small lang miss.
Saleslady: Hindi sir ah! Size pesos ang usa!
Rogelyn Donor, May 19, 2009

Life may lead us to different roads: meeting new people and learning new things.But one thing is for sure. I will never forget the road where I met you.Thanks for being there. Good night.
Ate Cathy, May 19, 2009

Juan: Murag naa kay nakalimtan karong adlawa ah.
Pedro: Ngano di ay, brad? Unsay okasyon?
Juan: Ana ka!
Pedro: Aw. Manluod man dayon. Happy Monthsary...
Rogelyn Donor, May 20, 2009

It is a stupid feeling when you are so desperate to ask a simple question and yet your heart is too damn scared to know the answer. Example: Ma'am, pasar ko?
Rogelyn Donor, May 20, 2009

Your future depends on your dreams...

...so, tulog lang! Magtatagumpay ka rin!
Mama, May 20, 2009

Life is a one way street; no matter how many doors you take, none of them leads back; so enjoy every moment of your life because none of them will happen the same way again. Good eve.
Rogelyn Donor, May 22, 2009