NGSB

NGSB. No Girlfriend Since Birth.

That's me. If you're a girl, that's NBSB: No Boyfriend Since Birth. Both are phrases which are factual in use but are derogatory in meaning. No, probably not derogatory. More like expressions of pity. 

In a previous post, I've talked about the probable reasons why I'm still single: Having a significant other is not a priority for me. I'm suffering from inferiority complex which I don't know I have. I'm contemplating priesthood. 

None of these though prove to reassure people that I'm okay being single, that I'm being happy with just me. Still, people ask me why and they have this look upon this face as if they're consoling someone whose entire family just died. In an airplane crash. On his birthday. While the rest of the passengers in that plane survive injury-free.

Perhaps, they have a point. Ma'am RN, for one, gave her best rendition of a caring sister while telling me that not having someone to love makes the heart go cold and hard until it stops beating. Ma'am Alav was more direct, asking me if I was gay. Sir Ramy went on sometime ago of the need to have a girlfriend so I won't miss out on life (especially if I become a priest).

As to that, I say that I'm aware I'm missing out. But like all things, the opportunity cost is also balanced by the benefits I've enjoyed so far. I have more time with my family, with things I really care about. I can do stuff without looking over my shoulder. I can know myself a bit more every day.

Eventually, I may meet someone. But until that time comes, I'll relish the moments of my single life.

So now, whenever someone asks, I belt out an excuse which I got from Henry: "Kailangan ko munang matutong mahalin ang sarili ko bago ako magmahal ng iba." 

It's not really truthful but it's convenient and people respect it much more than my actual reasons.