A Pinoy "Improv Everywhere"?

Lately, I've been thinking about copying the Improv Everywhere concept to the Filipino setting.

Wikipedia defines Improv Everywhere as a New York-based performance art group, which carries out "pranks" a la "Wow Mali" style (minus the overkill). A couple of ideas I have in mind:

Idea 1: A video featuring a street gang intent in wreaking havoc. Their mission? To teach some citizens a lesson. Their victims? Everyone who pees in public. Their modus operandi? Hit and run. While riding a motorbike, gang members throw ice water at men peeing in public.

Idea 2: A spoof on the Axe ad machine. A poster featuring an Axe product that is too effective. The poster features a tricycle driver (the Axe user) who had too much of a good thing. He is looking blankly forward as he is being harassed and groped by his male passengers, burly biker men who unfortunately go gaga after a whiff of the driver's cologne.

Idea 3: A documentary of the country's first-ever Mano Po lane. It features the opening of Davao City's "Respect for the Elders" lane, a specially marked sidewalk in C.M. Recto, where volunteers have lined up and are putting strangers' hands against their foreheads in a show of respect. The lane, as the script would go, is aimed at revitalizing the Dabawenyo's respect for elders.

Idea 4: A video featuring a haunted jeep. An unwary passenger is forced to ride a jeep chock-full of other passengers wearing aswang costumes (and other Halloween paraphernalia). It's going to be a riot as the "victim" begins to realize he is all alone during the long, long trip to Calinan.

Salamat Sa Modess

I'm not ashamed of what I'm going to share. Looking back, I can almost believe that it was Divine Providence that made me stuff a pack of Modess napkins in my backpack that fateful Wednesday night.

If you've read my past post about my Apo climb, I mentioned that I suffered from chaffed skin during our ascent. My inner thighs were becoming sore because of constant friction with my groin. I could make some conjectures regarding my condition then: I wore the wrong kind of underwear; my cycling shorts trapped a lot of moisture down there; or it was simply a case of bad luck. 

The bottom line was that I was in agony during our climb. My inner thighs were protesting with every stride, with every step. At one moment, I thought I might be walking home with blood dripping between my legs.

I tried self-medication. I plastered band-aids during the morning of Day 2 and again during our brief stay in Campsite 2. These didn't work. The band-aids weren't adhesive enough and simply fell off.

Then, the eureka moment. We were now at the peak and I was busy inside our tent, rummaging through the items in my bag, hoping for a remedy. I did pack a Modess pack, didn't I? I remember thinking of packing one just for the sake of it. Perhaps, a lady we might come across might be suffering from the monthly malady and would appreciate receiving something from us (On hindsight, I don't think any sane woman would climb Apo knowing her period is around the corner).

So I got one pad and was instantly fascinated at it. So this is what it looked like. The pad boasted a neat feature: adhesive strips on its sides, which was probably intended to make the pad stick to the panties. I began placing the pads inside out, one for each thigh, with the absorbent portion exposed to grab any moisture from my wet pants. 

The next morning, I knew I did the right thing. Walking was a breeze and I remember climbing down to Lake Venado, leaping across the grass. 

Salamat sa Modess, ika nga.

Apo Video

Just something my brother came up with. The backstory behind this was that our camera wasn't working properly. During the first day of the climb, I noticed that the pictures were too bright. I tinkered with the settings throughout our trek to no avail (My theory was that the graphics card was saturated with moisture). So I opted to record on video our visit to the top. My brother, a former Masscomm student, did the second part by editing a video out of the footage.

For later climbs, I'm thinking of doing a spoof horror-comedy film teaser using Apo as the backdrop. But that's for later. Right now, enjoy the clip. That's my proof I actually climbed Apo for good.

Here's the link to the video on Facebook (Be sure to log into Facebook first prior to clicking on the link).

Tips For The First Time Apo Climber

First up, a disclaimer: I've climbed Apo only once so far. That doesn't, in any way, make me an expert in the subject of climbing it. However, because I'm helpful and because I don't want those who follow me to have such a hard time, I'm offering some tips or advice for the newbie Apo climber.

In his song, Sunscreen, Baz Luhrmann comments that Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth. And it's true. The tips I'm going to give you are essentially an elaborate rehash of whatever it is that most have learned over the years. But here I go anyway:

Days In Apo

Day 1

Slept for only three hours. Slept at 12 midnight after packing my bag. Woke up at 3 AM. Hugs from Mama and Papa as they see us off in ADDU. Bulec forgot his ID and registration form. Fortunately, I had mine not yet filled up so we had a copy scanned and printed in an Internet shop (which was still open thanks to the junkies still fixed on their respective computer screens). On a jeep to Toril, then to Santa Cruz. Picked up Rommel along the way. First challenge was climbing a steep slope in Santa Cruz. On another ride to the rural countryside, on a multicab. Stopped on top of a hill, surrounded by nipa huts, for lunch. Then came the downpour. Rested for awhile until the rain weakened down to a drizzle. On we walked and finally set up camp after the rain returned with a vengeance. Shivering underneath my supposedly waterproof jacket. Aim was to make it to Camp 1 but that's not possible anymore. Couldn't set up the tent because our guides advised against it; our tent didn't have a fly. Tried to sleep instead in a small tent shared by five other souls: Bulec, Rayray, Sir Ramy, Anton, and Rommel.

Day 2

Sunny morning. Had breakfast and, from then on, it was up, up, and up. Thighs hurt because of chaffed skin. Finally reached Camp 1. Refilled water bottle, had lunch, and it was off to Camp 2. Tried to self-medicate my chaffed skin. Reached the boulders. Otherworldly. Nothing but rock but that was the first time I appreciated our efforts because I could finally see Davao Gulf. Reached Apo's crater. Really cold. Wind is unforgiving. Climbed up short of the peak then went down to the campsite. Lots of climbers. Lots of shit everywhere. Against expert advice, we set up our tent. Had dinner and a satisfying sleep, all snug in my sleeping bag.

Day 3

Woke up early to watch the sunrise but the clouds spoiled the fun. Spent several minutes in the peak before climbing down to fetch some water. Then the descent began. Several slips as we walk down the now very muddy trail (thanks to the hundreds of climbers who have preceded us). Reached Lake Venado. Set up tent and rain again came pouring down. Sleeping bag got wet and the tent was leaking. Uncomfortable sleep. Very cold. Watched a trail of lights across Apo's face, emanating from the headlights of climbers still descending from the peak at night.

Day 4

Rather uneventful day. Continued our descent. Stopped at a campsite for lunch then stopped again for balut and softdrinks. Trekked a river then finally made it to the end of the trail where officials were trying to collect money (exit fees) from climbers. Went away scot-free thanks to Rhab and relaxed at Lake Agco for awhile. On a van bound for Davao City. Really tired. Nice experience.

Apo

Just climbed Mount Apo.

And I'm guessing most of my posts from hereon will be about this experience.

The Lady In Front

Let's take a closer look at one peculiar Filipino tradition. 

When I was a fan of Jewel In The Palace, I remember watching the closing scene featuring the main protagonist, Jang-geum, walking along the beach with her lover, Min Jung-ho. The man is in front closely followed by the woman. 

Now take this. In the Philippines, that's unheard of (if you exclude the Chinese community). Either both man and woman walk together (in the cliche "Holding Hands While Walking" or HHWW scene) or the woman is ahead of the man. It might not mean much but it does show a fairly accurate portrayal of how Filipinos treat Filipinas or women in general. 

There's a joke surrounding the practice of women walking behind their man, though. In a thread from the website, TurntoIslam, Barbara Walters, a journalist, was visiting Afghanistan again after a previous stint in the country:  

She noted (then) that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands. Now, she observed that women still walked behind their husbands. Despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to, and are happy to, maintain the old custom. 

Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghan women and asked, "Why do you now seem happy with an old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?" 

The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land Mines." 

The thread would go on to some discussions about the necessity of putting a man in front of a woman, namely, to "shield" the woman from "tsansing" or the inevitable, albeit accidental, brushing of a woman's body against any incoming person. But that's not something I would like to expound on here (since the joke was about an Arabic custom, I prefer that Arabs do the explaining, not me). 

For me, having a woman walk in front instead of behind a man reflects our egalitarian structure when it comes to gender. Specifically, there are three points to be mentioned here, all stemming from this practice:

First: the woman sets the pace. Since she's in front, she dictates how fast or how slow the whole party goes. Though this does not spell relief for the bedraggled husband carrying his wife's shopping bags across the mall, it does show how considerate we are to the needs of the opposite sex. 

Second: the woman sets the direction of the travel. She dictates where to go because she's in front and she's the boss. 

Third: the woman is shown, not hidden. Unlike our Arabic counterparts, we prefer that our mothers, our sisters, our daughters, or our wives/girlfriends walk in front of us and greet everyone else with their beauty and grace. 

Basically, this custom, our custom, boils down to respect. We respect our women enough that we allow them to set the pace, dictate directions, and be whoever they want to be. And that's neat, if you ask me.

Text Messages 29

Mga bagay na ikaiinis mo...
Minor subject na feeling major.
Ipis na ayaw mamatay-matay.
Battery low.
Magsyotang naglalandian sa harap mo.
Tagged photos na wala ka namang pakialam.
Refrigerator na tubig lang ang laman.
Pinsan na sumbungero.
Load na mahirap i-unli.
Classmate mong sipsip.
Pasahero na ayaw i-abot ang bayad mo.
at Chain message na wapakels kung mamatay ka pag di mo na-send sa 25 na tao.
Edwin Gutierrez, January 6, 2011

We don't have everything to enjoy life.
But we have life to enjoy everything.
Always choose to see the nice things.
Life is happier that way.
Mary Ann Andicoy, January 8, 2011

If Cinderella's glass slippers fit perfectly, then why did it fall off along the way?
Maybe it speaks about one important thing:
Igat jud siya! Bilin-bilin aron gukoron!
Si little mermaid, gusto magka-legs aron makabilangkad!
Si sleeping beauty pa, tulog-tulog aron lamutakon!
Si snow white pa, patay-patay aron kamangon!
Kabantay mo? Puro inigat ang gitudlo sa fairy tales!
Edwin Gutierrez, January 9, 2011

GF: When man ta magpakasal?
BF: Asa man nimo gusto magpakasal? Sa pari o sa huwes?
GF: Natural, sa imo! Ihatag man nuon ko sa lain!
Edwin Gutierrez, January 9, 2011

Dili tanan party, malipayon - 3rd party (Ngeek)
Dili tanan 13, dimalas - 13th Month Pay (Yehey)
Dili tanan negative, makapaguol - Pregnancy Test (Whew)
Dili tanan positive, ikalipay - HIV positive (Araay)
Dili tanan hinog, masustansiya - Mata'g Tiki (Eowww)
Mary Ann Andicoy, January 10, 2011

Girlfriend texted Boyfriend.
GF: Han, I cheated. Sorry!
BF: Wow. Really? Me, too. With your best friend so patas na tayo.
GF: Huh?! Sa akong exam uy. Peste ka! Bulag nata!
Mary Ann Andicoy, January 15, 2011

Kinder boy: Can I kiss your hand?
Kinder girl: Why? Is there anything wrong with my lips?
Meet the new generation.
Edwin Gutierrez, January 23, 2011

Na miss taka...



is the common words used if naay maka-kita nimo nga gikan ka sa lugar nga nag-pista.
Na miss taka?
Mary Ann Andicoy, February 5, 2011

Happiness is not something you have in your hands. It's something you carry in your heart. Give it away generously and it will return to you a trillion fold.
Ate Cathy, March 1, 2011

Women always worry about the things Men forget.
Men always worry about the things Women remember.
Reggie Torino, March 1, 2011

Holy Week

The priest probably knew what we all had in mind. A budding curmudgeon, he went about reprimanding everyone in his homily for choosing to go on vacation during the holy week instead of observing the Lenten traditions of the church.

As for me, I was breezing along, muttering to myself, "Maski unsa pa ingon nimo Father, mukatkat gyapun kog Apo!"

Indeed, I will. This coming Thursday, I'll be joining my brothers and office mates in my first trek. Perhaps, I should feel more guilty about my decision but I was a devout Catholic since I was born and this was the first time (or was this the second?) I'd be spending time away from the church on the Holy Week.

Still, to keep the spirit of the season, I've resolved to remind myself throughout our ascent of this momentous occasion in our salvation history:

"Dear Bro,

I'm climbing Mount Apo this weekend.

Please keep us safe though. And as I climb, remind me of your sacrifice.

As I make my steps, remind me of the steps you took to Calvary.

As I endure the pain in my muscles, remind me of the pain you had to bear.

As I feel the weight of my backpack, remind me of the weight of your cross.

And as I look at the view from above, remind me of how much you've lost to gain all that I know see.

Amen."

Don't Pass The Baton

Resent not evil.

That's a principle of life I think everyone should encounter. In his book, Holistic Christianity, Joseph Conti talks about this idea which was always meant to change how we deal with everyone. The principle comes from many a typical experience when emotional states, mostly negative, are passed on through us. Someone barks at you, you bark back or worse, you transfer the negative energy to other people through hostile language. Rather than acknowledging these daily usurpations for what they are, we instead go about our motions, mechanically reacting to and internalizing what we have received.

Conti draws up an interesting analogy for this. He invites us to think about life as a relay race. "A baton is handed off from runner to runner and travels far. In much the same way, resentment snakes it way in daily life from person to person as a bewitching baton, causing hurt, confusion, anxiety, bitterness, and emptiness-as one person passes it on to the next, hardly aware of what its passing is costing him, or costing the one who receives this hideous baton."

The solution then? Resent not evil. Accept that all of us are in pain and resolve to not add further to that pain. Conti says it better, "We must try to see things from the other's position, aware of his or her difficulties. He passed on the bewitching baton because he did not know better; now that we are beginning to know better, we must neither internalize it nor pass it back, but dissolve it through the magic of Resent not evil."

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a great battle (Plato)."

Another analogy comes into mind. This principle invites us to be like human sponges. Although not quite as elegant as the baton, this analogy pretty much stresses the importance of this principle in society. A sponge absorbs dirt, oil, and grime and spews out soap and water, effectively cleansing whatever disgusting dishware you have in your hands. Just like a sponge, we should endeavor to answer every bit of rudeness and anger with good will and kindness. In this way, we help out each other by minimizing the emotions which impede our relations.

I guess such a principle runs contrary to what we are being taught. We've been taught to never bottle up our emotions but instead, let it all out lest these infect our emotional equilibrium. But the principle advises another way; let go of the moment, turn the other cheek, be like JC. In the end, that's a better way to live a life.

Going Acoustic

Acoustic music: comprises music that solely or primarily uses instruments which produce sound through entirely acoustic means, as opposed to electric or electronic means. The retronym "acoustic music" appeared after the advent of electric instruments, such as the electric guitar, electric violin, electric organ and synthesizer.

-Wikipedia

I love acoustic. Maybe, that's because I'm a frustrated guitarist or maybe, it simply has to do with the music itself. It's soothing and it never fails to stir something in me.

Pissed

Okay, so I was tapping away at the keyboard, enjoying a rare, lazy Saturday morning when I encountered this on Facebook:

As for the comments to the photo:
Rg Gumanao: hahahahahaha...buang jud ka karlos!
Rafael Mandala: hahaha bagay
Karlos Manlupig: ‎Rg Gumanao - haha. ikr. Rafael Mandala - thanks. sobrang namotivate ako na maging part ng GPH peacepanel.lol
Rafael Mandala: hahahahahhahahaha
Karlos Manlupig: ‎Rafael Mandala - kapag ako nag-ala Mike Defensor, kasalanan mo talaga ito
Rafael Mandala: hahahhaa bakit ako? haha
Karlos Manlupig: dahil sa pagcomment mo ng "bagay" namotivate ako
Rafael Mandala: bagay na bagay :D
Karlos Manlupig: teka...bagay? saan na party? GPH o NDF? lol
Rafael Mandala: GPH
Karlos Manlupig: scary. pero pwede rin. walang pera sa NDF. mga pulubi. samantalang sa GPH, show me the money.lol
Rafael Mandala: Hahaha. Karlos Manlupig, GPH Chief Peace Consultant, bagay na bagay.
Karlos Manlupig: lul! kinikilabutan ako.
Karlos Manlupig: scary.hahaha
Rafael Mandala: Hahahha. Ka Karlos Manlupig, pwede rin
Ed Xing: lol. ayos ah. :))
Kyle Paolo Tumbiga: Pwede pwede. Haha.

Somehow, the photo and the commentary that followed just rubbed me the wrong way. At first glance, the photo was not offensive actually. It was just Karlos doing a stupid impersonation of Sir Ednar.

But the context was a different story. The picture was presumably taken during a panel discussion between the NDF and the government, one of a series of events underlining the peace talks to end the country's long-standing communist insurgency. In the light of such serious stuff, one is bound to ethically observe a certain sense of propriety and delikadeza, something which Karlos Manlupig isn't exactly known for (and which perfectly explains the circumstance of this photo).

What did me in was this exchange above:

Karlos Manlupig: teka...bagay? saan na party? GPH o NDF? lol
Rafael Mandala: GPH
Karlos Manlupig: scary. pero pwede rin. walang pera sa NDF. mga pulubi. samantalang sa GPH, show me the money.lol

My eye twitched. Now, I understood the photo for what it was. It was a taunt, an accidental (or is it deliberate?) undermining of the efforts and motives of one of the government's more competent panel members to date. What are the reasons that would compel a young NDF member to pose for such a picture? You can imagine these reasons yourselves and none would be because he simply admires Sir Ed.

So, as the avid interloper, I commented:

"I know Sir Ednar Dayanghirang personally and he's genuinely, passionately concerned about bringing an end to this conflict. And this is what he gets for his troubles? An activist doing a mocking impression behind a nametag bearing his name? I can't believe you guys. Hindi ito cool dude."

In truth, maybe I was stretching the word "personally" quite a bit. But I can say I know Sir Ednar better than Karlos does. I remember that weekday morning when I was a guest in his house, sipping coffee, while listening to him talk about his recent appointment by the President as a peace panel member.

Surprisingly, when he was young, he was also an activist and that spirit of civic involvement that made him one, he carried on until today. He communed with farmers, the masses, knew their needs, understood the other side of the fence, so to speak. He was aware that he was making history, a history that should end with the cessation of all hostilities. For years, he admitted, past administrations had been coasting through the peace talks, hoping time will erode the insurgency. But that tactic no longer worked and it was his job to address the issues squarely in the face, the issues which have kept the insurgency burning till now, and bring about the long-awaited peace.

Did I interpret the photo too seriously? I don't think so. If the tables were reversed and it was, say, Norberto Gonzales, Jr. doing an impression of Fidel Agcaoili, I'm sure the NDF will find offense and will surely smell blood.

So I said what I said. Because Sir Ednar doesn't deserve this. Because we, the nation, do not deserve this as well.