Text Messages 31

GF: Luv, nagkaon kog calamay karon tas nakadom-dom dayun ko nimo.
BF: (kilig) Why man? Tungod kay sweet ko?
GF: Di oi! Mura man gud kag nawong ug bagol.
Edwin Gutierrez, March 21, 2011

Always stretch your heart and expand your love. So that it touches not only those whom you give it to, but also those who need it so much.
Mary Ann Andicoy, March 27, 2011

A nun rides a taxi.
Taxi Driver: Sister, it's always my dream to kiss a nun. Can you grant my wish?
Nun: Okay. But, first, you should be Catholic and, second, you have to be single.
Taxi Driver: I'm Catholic and I'm single.
So the nun fulfills the driver's wish and kisses him.
Taxi Driver: Thank you sister but I must confess. I lied to you. I'm married and I'm a Muslim.
Nun: That's okay. I'm on my way to a costume party and my real name is Dodong. Good kisser ka ha!
Edwin Gutierrez, March 30, 2011

Here's a fact: Did you konw taht hmuan brian can raed wrods wtih lteters rmubeld? As lnog as teh frist & lsat lteters of teh wrods aer at tehir porepr palecs...bceuase teh barin olny itnreperts teh wrdos and not teh seplilng of a ceratin wrod. fnatsatic ins't it?
Mary Ann Andicoy, April 5, 2011

Every king was once a crying baby and every great building was once a drawing. It's not about where you are today but it's where you will be tomorrow. Be inspired!
Ate Cathy, April 7, 2011

Sa Match class
Teacher: Kung naa koy usa ka piraso nga karne ug tungaon nako, pila na ka piraso?
Buknoy: Duwa Ma'am!
Teacher: Ug tungaon pa nako pareho?
Buknoy: Upat na Ma'am!
Teacher: Tungaon pa jud nako?
Buknoy: Walo na Ma'am!
Teacher: Tungaon pa jud nako?
Buknoy: Sixteen na Ma'am!
Teacher: Tungaon pa jud nako!
Buknoy: Thirty two na Ma'am!
Teacher: Kung tungaon pa jud?
Buknoy: Sixty four! (suko na)
Teacher: Ug tungaon pa jud nako ug kaduha?
Buknoy: Ipagaling na lang na Ma'am ke malangan nata!
Edwin Gutierrez, April 17, 2011

Boy: Miss, pwede mag-ask? Unsa nay time?
Girl: Mag-ask ka unsa nay time? Tas mag-ask dayun ka sa akong name? Tas mangayo dayun kag number? Tas manguyab dayun ka? Tas pakipot sugton ra dayun taka? Tas manghagad kag date? Tas dad-on dayun ko nimo sa bisan asa? Tas naay mahitabo nato? Tas mabuntis dayun ko? Tas biyaan ra ko nimo? Di ko mo-ingon ui!
Boy: Whoooaahh! Grabe ka-advance ba anang reloha...
Edwin Gutierrez, May 1, 2011

Graduation Speech:
A fleasance evening to all, to me, to you, they and everyone. Tonight, I am graduation, and I'm froud of me. I invitation you all to eat our house because I know, someday, I will eat your house too. I will die ten chickens, 7 girls, and 3 boys, to eat you all and I will ask my father to cook my mother. I'm suring you will come because I'm graduation. Thanks you.
Edwin Gutierrez, May 5, 2011

True happiness is not about a big laugh or tears of joy. It's about a simple smile whenever you remember people who made your life simple but completely happy.
Ate Cathy, May 5, 2011

What if love is for sale? Can we afford to buy it? How much do you think is the price of love? How about those who cannot afford it? Maybe, that's why God made it for free so everybody can spend or give it freely.
Mary Ann Andicoy, May 10, 2011